The Man-Child and I only have one cell phone that we share. Not because we cannot afford two—although who really can today—but because I was paying over fifty dollars a month to have a fancy clock.
So in genuine Man-Child spirit, he forgot to remember that his phone ran out of minutes today, which left us running frantically to get minutes put on his phone this morning. Of course our luck being what it is left us waiting for the minutes to load even after purchasing the plan.
Long story short—and one Dunkin Run later—we went to pick our daughter up from school early because we had to get her brother right after that. When we got to the school, Kay-Bug was already in the office. I immediately panicked. Did they try to call us?
They were about too!
Weird, right? It get’s weirder.
So they explained that Kayleigh had an accident and had come to the office, but didn’t give us anymore detail about it. I checked her over, but she looked and felt dry. What accident? When I asked her, she told me it had happened way earlier in the day. Still, why go to the office now once the problem had kind of resolved itself over time.
I never should have asked!
The teacher brought her stuff to us and I knew something was going on. The teacher typically does not leave, she will have a helper being the things to the office. She walked over and I could see it written all over her face, “How do I say this?”
Great …. they tried to call earlier.
Apparently another little girl had gone into the bathroom and decided to poke around a little bit. For some unearthly reason she was snooping in the toilet paper contraption, which just so happened to be where my daughter had stuffed her underwear earlier that day,
Yes, you heard what I said.
So … the rest of the story went kind of like this:
The little girl comes screeching out of the bathroom holding my daughters panties like a war flag.
Teacher wonders where the hell panties came from.
Girl explains she found them in the contraption.
Teacher wishes she had become a doctor instead of a teacher.
Teacher gathers all of the girls into a small huddle—which I would like to point out might not have resolved anything because you never know what boys are wearing these days either—and proceeds to ask where said undies came from.
I expect my daughter was shitting herself right about now, but she fessed up and told the truth.
Daughter was asked to go to the office …. and we walked in at the same time.
I was speechless. What do you say to that? Why was the girl snooping in the toilet paper holder? I felt a surge of emotions and each one was probably not what anyone else wanted me to feel.
Relief– my five year old daughter can handle herself. She had an accident. Did she sit in it all day long quietly? Did she sit in her seat and cry like most five year olds would? I know the right answer would have been to tell the teacher, but she’s only been in school a week and a half. She didn’t know how the teacher would respond and was afraid she might get in trouble. So she took care of the problem, stuffed her undies in the only place she could find to hide them and went about her day.
I’m not a sick mother who would condone this behavior in front of my daughter, and we had a very long talk about germs and appropriateness, but I will admit I was a bit relieved to hear this.
Sadness– my poor baby had to deal with that all alone. Instantly I thought of her sitting in the bathroom, choking back tears, wishing I were there with her but being too afraid to say anything. She was probably lonely and scared. My heart wept for her ….
Frustration– why the hell was that little shit snooping in the toilet paper dispenser?
Pride– even though that had to have been an excruciatingly embarrassing moment, she did not let another take the fall. She stood tall and fessed up to her mistake. Sure, they might still tease her about this day when she’s in high-school but goddamnit my daughter is brave! I don’t even know if I could sit here and tell you I would have admitted to that. Would you?
We all handle things differently.
I am glad they found them today because I hate to imagine the scene that would have unfolded had my daughter came home without underwear on. Luckily that did not happen, they didn’t call before we got there and the teacher brushed it off as normal kindergarten behavior. We all learned a lesson today:
Man-Child learned that he needs to be better organized and take responsibility for adult things.
Kayleigh learned that even though it can be hard, telling the truth is always right.
Teacher learned that she made a bad career choice.
Little girl learned not to stick her nose in places it doesn’t belong.
I learned that my daughter is going to be just fine …..