Today has been the perfect storm on my usually calm nerves. I’m pretty easy-going and it takes a lot to try my patience, but today was hand delivered from hell by the devil himself okay!
I fell asleep on the couch last night while I was snuggling with my BabyBug, and spent the better part of the night twisted about in the free space around her. Hello Thirty …. I am getting old and I know “thirty is not old” but it sure feels old!
The rest of the day was spent fighting one battle after another and all with a stiff neck, aching joints and a throbbing headache!
It seriously felt like the entire house was against me! I think they all got together and had a family meeting, in which they brainstormed as many ideas as they could with the goal being to drive Mommy bat shit crazy!
Everything Bug touched, she spilt. Everything I cleaned, someone came behind me and messed it back up. Everything that is supposed to not be touched, was like the holy grail to that girl today. She didn’t want one thing to do with the forty toy boxes that are stuffed with every toy made in the last five years, oh no, she wanted scissors and glue! Everything I said fell on deaf ears, and Man-Child seemed extra irritating today!
I had a great idea! I gave Bug some play dough, something we only use once in a while because of the mess she makes with it lol, and sat on the couch to close my eyes. My HOPE was that Man-Child would keep an eye on her while I rested to clear my headache, but silly me …. I was being delusional again!
Hey I get his argument! He has the kids during the day while I work, so when I’m home I do normally take over most of the responsibilities. Let’s be real though, I work eight hours a day, it’s not like I’m gone more then I’m home! Also I am working; it’s not like I’m clubbing it up with my besties …. Seriously!
So whatever, no rest for the wicked.
Tomorrow she will beg me for play dough. Tomorrow she will spend hours making a giant mess on my floor. Today she wanted absolutely nothing to do with it!
So we went outside! Fresh air might be good for my head and anyways she could blow off some steam! I’ll be damned if that girl didn’t zone in on everything she couldn’t have! She wanted scissors so she could …. wait for it …. Cut The Grass! She wanted water so she could make mud. She wanted to roll in the dirt … what the hell is going on around me today?
Is it bad that I was momentarily tempted to give her scissors and let her spend hours cutting the grass? I mean I didn’t, but I won’t lie to you, I thought about it!
Man-Child was particularly bitchy today as well. Do men have periods? I think he might have been having his ….
Everything was a fight. Every time I spoke he had an argument at the ready. Every answer I had was the wrong one. Seriously, he was acting exactly like a girl on their rag! It was ridiculous!
Half way through the day I fond myself standing in the middle of a giant temper tantrum! Kayleigh was on the floor screaming because she wanted glue and sciiiiiissssssooooorrrrssss! Man-Child was running around the house trying to find a charged that he misplaced, but god forbid it was him that misplaced it, like MooooooooMmm where’s my charged, where did you put it, you must have touched it, IT WAS RIGHT HERE!
At that moment I didn’t feel strong. At that moment I didn’t feel like a good mother. At that moment I felt so much guilt because I wanted to run screaming to my room and screw the door shut! DEAL WITH YOUR SHIT GUYS!
I wanted to hand Kayleigh a bottle of glue and a pair of scissors and tell her “go cut the grass honey then glue it back together and cut it again!” I wanted to find Man-Child’s charger, put super glue on it and shove it up his ass. There … you won’t lose it now! I was a bad Mommy ….
I didn’t obviously do any of that!
I flew around the house and found the charger in two minutes. I spent the afternoon gluing leaves to paper with Kayleigh. Now I just finished cooking supper and in about ten minutes everyone is going to bed!
I made it through! I survived and you know what? Maybe I’m not such a bad Mumma after all!
Although …. if Man-Child loses that charged one more time we might be reading a different story tomorrow!