Things You Never Said Untill You Had Kids

Things You Never Said Untill You Had Kids

My fellow parents, you know exactly what I’m talking about! Your Mom always seemed to know how to insert an embarrassing quote or saying into every conversation and you thought “Boy, I’ll never do that!”

Wrong wrong ding dong!

(That’s number one btw!)

So I thought it would be fun to take a minute and create a list of the weirdest things never thought I would say …. ya’ll ready?

“Stop picking your brothers nose”

“Get your hand out of your pants”

“What do you mean, your butt itches”

“Did you wipe good enough”

“You put What in your ear”

“You PUT WHAT in your brothers ear”

“Stop licking everything”

“Don’t lick my face”

“Put down the cat poop”

“Don’t you dare eat that”

“Wash Your Hands”

“Don’t play with your poop”

“Crayons are for paper ONLY”

“Alright, who colored on my wall”

“If everyone jumped off a cliff would you”

“Do you know what would happen if you jumped off a cliff”

“Listen to me”

“We don’t poke people with sticks”

“Get the stick out of your nose”

“Stop eating the playdoh”

“Blow it off, you can still eat it”

“Was did her poop look like”

“Is that chocolate or poop”

“STOP licking the window”

“Books are to read, not make a path in my living room and walk on”

“Why is their a horse in the toilet”

“Where’s the toilet paper”

“We don’t make birds nests in our room with toilet paper”

“Why is their water and lotion all of the floor”

“we don’t make slip and slides in the house”

“Go outside!”

“wait until your older”

“Your too old to do that”

“HOW old are you”

“money dosent grow on trees”

“Be careful …. ”

“I told you to be careful, didn’t I?”

“Boogers are not food”

“We don’t bite”

“what did you just say”

“Thank you for the flower, but next time please leave the house Plants alone”

“put your pants back on”

“When I was your age …”

“Clean up this mess”

“Why am I the only one cleaning this mess”

“Put the couch cushions back on the couch”

“Don’t sit on his head”

“Don’t give me that look”

“Your face is going to freeze that way”

“DONT say another word!”

“If you know good for you ….”

“Mommys not here right now”

“Let’s play the quite game”

“We don’t eat grass”

“You don’t know where that’s been”

“Get off the counter”

“Dont even look at each other”

“I don’t know where it went”

“That noisy toy? Oh, it broke”

“Get the fish out your pants”

Sheesh …. I could keep going all day, but I have things to do … places to be! Okay, I’m probably just going to go to Dunkins!

Whats the weirdest thing you have ever said to your child? Comment below!

 

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